Courtney Howard // Film Critic
ONE NIGHT ONLY
Rated R, 1 hour and 42 minutes
Directed by: Will Gluck
Starring: Callum Turner, Monica Barbaro, Maya Hawke, Andrew Burnap, Molly Ringwald, LeVar Burton, King Princess, Charlie Gillespie, Ella Loudon, Julia Fox, Roma Maffia, Sydney Cole Alexander, Ben Marshall, Este Haim, Ziwe, Mike Birbiglia, Jay Ellis
ONE NIGHT ONLY is a romantic comedy centered on two lovelorn folks yearning for something real in an unreal reality. It tasks audiences to buy into two high concepts dealing with its absurdist premise right off the bat: The first being that government lawmakers – men who’ve historically never been known for their ability to keep it in their pants – have enacted a mandate that bans sex solely for single people on all but one night of the year. Think THE PURGE, but with sex. The second is that we’re forced to believe that both Callum Turner (who just married the hottest woman on the planet, Dua Lipa) and Monica Barbaro (herself also a smoke-show) are such sadsacks that they can’t find true love, especially on a night filled with wanton desperation by its participants.
Director Will Gluck and screenwriter Travis Braun (who, in 2024, landed on the Black List with this script) experience major trouble with their preposterous gimmick from moment one. Unlike the CARS movies which are powered by the belief audiences automatically buy into the world as built, ONE NIGHT ONLY never stops reminding us that what we’re watching is unbelievable on all accounts, especially in the contrived ways it keeps the eventual lovebirds apart time and time again. The filmmakers are continually hung up on justifying their gimmick rather than primarily delivering an intelligent romantic comedy. Frustrating, underwhelming and in desperate need of zestful pep when it comes to its lackluster comedic timing, the portrait painted is more bleak dystopia than colorful, heartwarming surreality.
When we first meet pizza shop owner Owen (Turner) and struggling singer Allie (Barbaro), it’s 3 years into the sex mandate imposed by the government to control pre-marital sex, STDs and teen pregnancy. The 12 hour free-for-all has proven effective – except when it comes to people searching for Mr. or Mrs. Right versus Mr. or Mrs. Right Now. Just as their latest free night of frivolity is to begin, Owen’s girlfriend (Maya Hawke) announces she wants to sleep with someone else, causing Owen to rethink proposing to her that night. Allie is all set to spend a tasteful evening out, finding a good guy with her bestie Jacinta (King Princess), but as soon as she arrives for drinks, Jacinta meets a literal prince and ditches Allie.
Owen and Allie head home feeling dejected, right before bumping into each other and instantly connecting in a classic NYC meet-cute moment. That is until Owen ruins it by vomiting his sushi dinner at her feet. Both retreat to their respective safe spaces: Allie returns to her apartment, where her lesbian roomie Arya (Quintessa Swindell) is babysitting an obnoxious tween, and Owen heads to his mother Linda’s (Molly Ringwald) brownstone, where she’s about to have adventurous sex with her boyfriend Rick (LeVar Burton). As Allie and Owen return to mingle with the masses, they inadvertently continue to bump into each other, first reuniting at a bodega attempting to buy the last remaining condom in the city, then again at a police station, and then again combining forces to infiltrate an elite party thrown by wealthy Vivian (Ella Loudon) where Allie’s celeb crush Ezra Strong (Charlie Gillespie) is playing. Although it would seem the two might have their impulsive needs met for the night, they both wonder if fate has better plans for them.
It would be one thing if “The Mandate” was just a concept that played out in the background of these characters’ lives, but it’s not. The political nature of it rears its ugly head when we are craving escapism, distracting us with the rules of this reality-adjacent world and logistical questions about it. TVs programmed to news stations act as literal background noise, breaking into the forward momentum of the comedic shenanigans. Allie has conversations with her potential paramours about it, specifically the bio-marker tattoo folks are forced to adopt. We spot big “repeal” signs in residents’ windows, protest graffiti scrawled across street construction and public information graphics plastered on police station walls. It’s absurd to be thinking of the intricacies of this directive – and yet, here we all are, asking if Big Business and Big Pharma lobbyists in Washington would’ve prevented such madness that would hurt their bottom line. As a satirical mockery of buffoonish government policies, it’s not thought out very intelligently.
In addition to the rules and regulations thrust upon us, perhaps the most frustrating element is why Allie and Owen can’t be together despite Owen’s initial fumble. Braun works overtime inventing one convoluted situation after another to keep the pair separated, from the smooth, bad-boy biker (Andrew Burnap) to the Tinder-y honeypot (Sydney Cole Alexander), when neither of these situations are the least bit funny. Same goes for all the hijinks involved with Allie and Owen’s respective post-party hookups. Each of these awkward vignettes suffer from pacing issues as they frequently outstay their welcome.
Much of the genuine laughs stem from Allie’s day job, singing dehumanizing pharmaceutical jingles that spoof Sarah Bareilles’ “Brave” and Vanessa Carlton’s “A Thousand Miles.” A tighter edit, overall, would help make the jokes and wild gags land. It might also make the cameo parade of supporting players (which include Julia Fox, Roma Maffia, Nicholas Braun, Ben Marshall, Este Haim, Jay Ellis, Ziwe, Mike Birbiglia and two of Gluck’s ANYONE BUT YOU stars in covert mode) more palatable instead of straight up thirsty.
Unsurprisingly, what does function to the film’s greatest advantage are the scenes where Allie and Owen work together to overcome their problems. Their energetic repartee seated in the waiting area of a police station and action-forward sequences like the bodega boost where they not only destroy a display case, but have to fish their prize out of a gutter, spark charm and effervescence. They’ve also got heat when they inevitably meet up at Owen’s pizza joint and are predictably disarmed by each other. We can thankfully credit Turner and Barbaro, who share great chemistry, for elevating the material, gifting their twin flames with a bit more depth and dimension.
ONE NIGHT ONLY wishes it were AN AFFAIR TO REMEMBER (a film the characters reference, but the filmmakers clearly don’t understand why those fundamentals work) meets AFTER HOURS, only it doesn’t come with the pedigree and even fewer innovative ideas. As a contemporary sex comedy, it’s far too afraid to actually show the eroticism of sex, hand-waving the potential of its sole sexy moment. If this is purity propaganda, that’s for everyone to decide of their own volition.
Grade: 2 out of 5
ONE NIGHT ONLY will be in theaters on August 7.
