‘SALEM’S LOT’ Review: This Stephen King Adaptation Ain’t It

Courtney Howard // Film Critic

SALEM’S LOT

Rated R, 1 hour and 53 minutes

Directed by: Gary Dauberman

Starring: Lewis Pullman, Bill Camp, Jordan Preston Carter, Makenzie Leigh, Alfre Woodard, William Sadler, Nicholas Crovetti, Cade Woodward, Pilou Asbæk, John Benjamin Hickey, Alexander Ward, Debra Christofferson

Stop me if you’ve heard this story before: A dark menace is plaguing a small town in Maine – a town deeply in denial about this festering evil – and the only folks formidable enough to combat it are an author of critically maligned books and a tween boy. On the most superficial of plot reads, SALEM’S LOT has a few things in common with IT. After all, it’s by the same author Stephen King. Throw in the adapting screenwriter from those two solid films, who is now directing as well, and you’d assume it’s the perfect marriage. Not so fast, unfortunately. Gary Dauberman, who proved himself an incredibly capable filmmaker with his directorial debut ANNABELLE COMES HOME (which blended heart and horror into a perfectly calibrated mix), sees his sophomore picture hobbled by a too-brief runtime, lackluster character development, and an overall failure to make his cover tune sing.

Author Ben Mears (Lewis Pullman) is returning home to Jerusalem’s Lot after many years, seeking inspiration for his next novel. His books were ravaged by the critics and haven’t sold particularly well. He even fails to impress the bob-sporting real estate office receptionist, Susan Norton (Makenzie Leigh), when he comes in seeking a room to rent. But as luck would have it, he’s arrived just at the right time. A mysterious Mr. Barlow (Alexander Ward) has recently moved into the creepy Marsten house high atop the hills overlooking the quaint, picturesque town and is stirring up some chatter from locals, thanks to his antique shop run by his business partner Richard Straker (Pilou Asbæk).

Yet things don’t start getting spooky until tweens Ralph Glick (Cade Woodward) and his brother Danny (Nicholas Crovetti) turn up dead due to unexplained circumstances. Their pal Mark Petrie (Jordan Preston Carter), however, suspects something far more malevolent is at play, given Danny shows up at his house hovering outside his second story window with glowing yellow eyes, beckoning him to join his new crew. Soon elementary school teacher Matt Burke (Bill Camp) witnesses his gravedigger friend Mike’s (Spencer Treat Clark) eerie transformation from sick to sinister, and realizes vampires are attacking citizens. He, along with Ben, Susan and Mark, must warn and convince Officer Parker Gillespie (William Sadler), Father Callahan (John Benjamin Hickey) and Dr. Cody (Alfre Woodard) to take action before it’s too late.

In the interest of brevity and a truncated run time, Dauberman makes the grave mistake of telling the audience crucial details rather than demonstrably showing them. Expositional dialogue prevails when learning anything about the characters’ motivations or inner-workings, from Ben’s return to Parker’s ultimate cowardice. With Susan, as well as a few of the others, we’re quickly shuffled through excuses to care about their narrative inclusion. Characters’ demises are weightless in impact. Sure, we get the lay of the land through transitional montages highlighting a once-bustling small town (where milk is delivered by a friendly milkman and people walk smiling down the warmly-lit streets) now abandoned and desolate (with their mail, milk and newspapers piling up and empty landscapes). However, we’re never given the occasion to feel any of their fear, denial, grief or frustrations when their friends and family disappear.

With the exception of Susan’s overbearing mother Anne (Debra Christofferson), there’s little to no arcs for anyone. Ben is set up as the protagonist, but is forgotten about time and time over. If he’s gaining any inspiration from this extraordinary circumstance, we’ll never know. He’s poorly drawn and entirely milquetoast as he’s not the person guiding the discoveries when it comes to the vampires. That would be Matt, whose greatest defining trait is that his perpetual inquisitiveness leads him into sticky situations. Intrepid Mike might be the most interesting person in the sprawling ensemble as he’s the lone soul gifted with a compelling sense of fearlessness. But he doesn’t waver at all from where he began as an intelligent badass staring down the schoolyard bully. Father Callahan’s struggle with his faith and purpose is an absolute nothing burger when it could’ve been utilized to stronger effect. Same goes for the hacky handling of the law abandoning them in their time of need.

Worse, there are no opportunities to be scared by anything that’s happening. It’s undoubtedly ruthless when the first death we see is the killing of a frightened, helpless child. But unlike in DOCTOR SLEEP, when we also see a kid die gruesomely, we don’t care about how the trouble escalates. Anchoring this in 1975 adds nothing to the proceedings except just as a nod to when King’s novel was published. Dauberman frequently has problems finding the right tone, oscillating from unbelievably stupid scenarios (specifically Ben and Susan’s inability to make tongue depressors into crosses to ward off a vamp in the morgue) to genuinely entertaining sequences (specifically the ticking-clock battle against a setting sun at the drive-in). Though Dauberman demonstrates a modicum of visual dexterity (like a sharp headshot, as well as a cool dissolve between a business logo and god’s eye shot of a Hitchcockian staircase), his attempts at levity fall flat the moment the words grace the actors’ lips.

Not goofy enough to be classified as camp and not serious enough sustain any indelible terrors, SALEM’S LOT comes up short of its potential. While this might technically be better and sleeker than Tobe Hooper’s 1979 TV mini-series, that’s a low bar as it’s still wholly underwhelming. It leaves a lot to be desired.

Grade: 2 out of 5

SALEM’S LOT played Beyond Fest on September 25. It debuts on Max on October 3.